JOHNNY MIC’S HOPPIN’ JOHN
2 tbsp grapeseed oil
2 ham hocks
1 meaty hambone
1 cup chopped ham
1 cup chopped onion
1/2 cup chopped carrot
1/2 cup chopped celery
1/2 cup bell pepper
1 tbsp. chopped garlic
32 oz. chicken stock
32 oz. water
1 lb. collard greens, ribs removed, chopped into 2 in. squares
2 bay leaves
1 teaspoon dried thyme
1 lb. frozen black-eyed peas
Heat oil in large soup pot, then brown ham hocks and ham bone, about 6 minutes, remove from pot. Add chopped ham, onions, carrot, celery, bell pepper and garlic. The onions will give off enough liquid to scrape the browned bits off the bottom of the pot. Saute 4 minutes or until onions begin to get soft, nestle ham bone and hocks back in the pot. Add chicken stock, water to cover. Add bay leaves, thyme. Add collard greens. Set pot to simmer for 1 hour. After 25 minutes, add black-eyed peas. Cook remaining 35 minutes or until peas are soft. Serve over wild rice or long grain rice or both. Happy New Year!
According to this recent Globe article, McDonald’s has found yet another way to suck by hiring Arnold Communications to shoot more of these lame spots. The ad agency says the accents suck on purpose, but the Globe article confirms what I suspected all along — the actors are from New York.
I always knew this weird commercial was not right (wrong). To paraphrase Bloodsox scribe Rob Zeitz, a New Englander would ask for his coffee by saying: “Gimme my *&@!’in coffee!”
Some folks say that Christmas Vacation was not very good, but I think it gets better w/age. Catch it if you can to see the master slapstick artistry of Chevy Chase, which by our crumbling standards, is nowadays in short supply.
Wharpua sent me this. I’m thinking about sending it to…um, everybody? Forget the virus, I’ve caught the cold, thanks to the good works over at Red Letter Media. The suicidal pretense of the voice over alone is worth its weight in Galactic Credits. Watch the next chapter on YouTube by clicking here.
Each episode is 43 minutes without commercial interruption…watching 2 episodes a night between now and 2/2 will get through Seasons 1-5 in time for the final season premiere. If someone knows of an app that will make this happen in my hdtv (while preempting network programming), send me an email. ‘Til then…Ladies and gents, start your downloads!
Extra Credit: At the Lost website, check out the weird Dharma Mysteries in the video section.
For covering the new standards being set in the Hanky-Panky Dept. by T. Woods (and after a paid visit from her Nazi collaborators late last night), our studio is proud to announce the first ever Lara Spencer Spokesperson Of The Year Award to this year’s incipient recipient, our inspiration, Lara Spencer. Kudos Lara and thank you for sizing the photo!
2nd best spin this week: The Insider – During a round table discussion w/Niecy and Sabato, Jr., Lara Spencer closes the segment suggesting Tiger Woods has “done us a favor by bringing this issue out into the open.” Eeech.
From his secret underground bunker, Dick Cheney touted the Mediocrity Machine that has been running at near capacity since its power source, the Hadron Super Collider in Geneva has come back online.
Cheney assured the Evil Press that the shortage of dumb white people , i.e. “the base,” whose numbers had been declining since the election, was over and on the upswing, citing recent wins at the American Music Awards and Dancing With The Stars.
